Goodnight. [22/11/11/]

I like to write at night.The night is quiet, take away my mothers current cough and my cat pouncing on whatever, and it is perfect.

For writing at least. It makes me want to do 'goodnight' posts.

The best writing I do is done in silence, because my head is clear (well, somewhat) and

there are none of the distracting sounds that happen during the day.

I can think about the day and perfectly construct it into sentences.

Typically, my life is pretty average right now. As ever. It's up to me to change it, I know.

But we won't go into that, because that's a whole new chapter.

It was just a another average day, really. A slight break in routine, involving make up.

{I told you about that earlier}

I spent almost the entirety of the afternoon listening to Travis... sometimes I have these moments of

just wanting to sit and listen to one artist. That happened today.

I managed to drown the voices, the arguments and everything completely out for the first time

in quite a while earlier this evening. I managed to forget the hurt. And be content.

If only... just for a moment.

I'm content. Not happy. But I'm content.

Tomorrow doesn't have really any plans. 

I'm hoping to buy train tickets for that adventure to a familiar place I was talking about.

November is slipping away. And I have promises to fulfil.

Eleven.

This is the typical time of day I write. 

When it's quiet and I can think clearly. And my mind won't rest, it'll just think about the same damn negative things.

Night time. Darkness peeking through the tiny space in my curtains. The time I would be better off sleeping... but don't.

That's writing time. I'm often up late - late for me anyway - scribbling away in that little golden book of

mine. By day, it's kept in my handbag. By night, it sits bedside. On top of my record player. With a pencil close by for late night thoughts & musings. When I'm tired, it's worse. Things pop into my head and if I don't write it down immediately, I pretty much forget it.

These little things are important to me. It's important, no matter how irrelevant, strange or useless these midnight thoughts are, that I write them down. I write for the sake of writing and remembering.

So I can look back on them.

~

Nearly everyone in my family has some form of cough or cold or illness, right now.

And I'm sitting here having a battle with my stomach not because they've passed it onto me, but because of my own fault. It's somewhere in between comfort eating & bordem eating. It's not either. But a bit of both.

Something that's entirely down to me. It comes and goes. like everything concerning food & me. 

We have a tough relationship. But we're getting there.

I'm kind of hoping not to get sick as I'm planning on getting on a train, before this month disappears completely, for an unplanned-half planned adventure. 

Sometimes you just have to do things you once secretly, quietly promised yourself. 

And that is what's going to happen.

I'm going somewhere familiar. Somewhere I didn't think I'd go back to after all the bad memories it holds.

But it now holds special somethings and reasons I want to go back for.

And you know, I don't mention sh!t until it's done or set in stone. 

So you better believe, I will report back.

Goodnight.