I seem to have a growing problem with being happy that others are happy.
Don't get me wrong, I don't mean 'general' people - I mean, people that were in
my life, until they lost interest and drifted away or the ones that chose to just
I can't seem to be happy that they are happy, maybe it's because that means
they're happy without me in their lives.
They're over it.
I guess I've always had issues with letting go. Givng up. Walking away. Forgetting.
I should've given up a long time ago, but there I go, sending her messages,
make believing we still have a friendship. And when she replies, eventually, it fills me
with hope - how naieve - and so I reply. But I have to send about 3 messages and
several reminders and hints to her before she bothers replying. Before she remembers.
She has more issues than I can comprehend. But that didn't stop her being a
friend for 4 years. Why stop now?
The remains of our friendship are still there. There's still some light at the end of the
tunnel. But often it feels like I'm stuck in the middle of the tunnel & knowing, slowly I'm
blinding myself by looking into the light.
I guess you could say I've been blind to a lot of things.
And blinded by some too.